10 Years

This one actually feels monumental.

Last year came and went... and I don't think we even exchanged cards.

Like the other time we bought cards but left them in their bags to be found, later, unsigned.

Things had been so busy with moving and school starting.

New life.

Again.

And so this year seemed big.

Driving down the flat highway across Michigan to see the traveling circus.

Kids, big, in the back.

It just all felt so right.

So easy.

So comfortable.

Like a big exhale... finally.

Finally.

So many things have come and gone.

So many hard times.

And I can say, that we are better for it.

I have changed in a way that needed changing.

So it feels like an accomplishment.

A marker that feels solid.

And in the midst of this big day, is life.

Work and errands and appointments.

Anxiety about Baby's vaccinations.

She not one for the white coats after her un-anesthitized stitches.

Proving herself ever the soldier.

Not one muscle tensed.

It was amazing.

What a relief.

And then I left with the unexpected poke.

"Have you been referred to a cardiologist?"

"No...." I managed to breathe out, my own heart now racing.

Today of all days in the back of my mind.

And then, of course, yes, today of all days.

It's all part of it.

Fitting its importance.

My Weekend Reading

photo journalist turned circus wife and mother= blog perfection

The Big Top

The thing about a small one ring circus....

(Especially in your $2 extra ring side seats... which are LITERALLY touching the outside of the ring)

Is that your proximity to the death defying acts...

Is death defying.

Like when this tiger stared me down.

It was about 15 feet away.

With only that open cage in between us.

I almost died.

Or when this guy was walking upside down.

Right over our heads.


An elephant almost pooped IN MY LAP.

I thought I was going to be trampled by camels.


I felt the fuel accelerant on my face when the human volcano spit fire

And it was all worth it.

100% exhilarating.

Totally worth the 2 hours there and back.