Finally

Sure I'm getting ready to leave this house. But I finally figured out a good window treatment for those side windows that overlook our screened in porch. They've been the bane of my decorating existence because I needed something that didn't clash with the velvet drapes I already had... and I didn't want to spend more than a couple of bucks... and I needed something that could completely block out the sun as these are East facing windows. The velvet drapes are actually a deep dusty grape color the new roman style shades are brown sail cloth. Whatever. Close enough. I've spent close to 2 years trying to find curtains that were a closer match and I'm over it. All of our doors are a very dark brown stain and they match that. I got the new rod and shades for about $30. I feel pretty good about it.

Good News

Mr F and I have settled on a plan of action. The past couple of weeks have been stressful and some words have been expressed (to put it gently).  I think we have a better understanding about how we all feel and we have been able to apply that knowledge to a good resolution.  I am feeling greatly relieved.  We all are.  

Now hopefully the procrastination can come to an end.

Today we are tackling some house projects and moving our house forward.  

Expect greatness mediocrity (or at least not trash covering the floor) out of our office... I hope.

I'm also doing a major cull on the girls' room and toy shelves in our living room... this is always a sensitive special ops project.  Thank God it snowed again and I can banish them out for a bit.  Of course when I did that yesterday I ended up being summoned to the back yard by Baby's screams... running through the snow in my socks mind you... apparently Kid "accidentally" (accidentally on purpose) hit her in the face with a large stick.  She looks like she was in an alley fight.  Thankfully for Kid she doesn't hold a grudge.  

That's all for now...

Mr F is starting on his side of the office.

Pray for us...

Bitch Fest Friday

... because it's been awhile and I need it.

People, I am really suffering right now.  I'm having so many feelings that I feel like I want to explode with the biggest tantrum of all time.  One thing that sucks about having kids is that you have to hold yourself together.  And right now that is hard.  

You know how when you were in school and you had finals and you had 4 major papers you had to write with a million references footnoted (and this was in the days of researching on microfiche!!!) and you were procrastinating and waiting until about the last possible minute to start (36 hours before it was due... on a good day).  And you got all ready to get down to business and then suddenly you were so inexplicably tired.  You could not stay awake.  You know it isn't helping matters but it's like you've been struck with procrastination induced narcolepsy.  

Was that just me?

Well THE SAME SHIT is going down right now.  I keep falling asleep... and, people, I do not fall asleep.  I never took a nap the entire time I had a newborn.  I am hardcore.  And here I am yesterday sound asleep with Baby putting a crown on my head and slapping me in the face with a diaper.  

I just cannot deal with how out of control I feel and I am shutting down.

Oh and yesterday Baby got one of those giant hives that aren't hives but some more severe allergic reaction that landed her in the ER a couple of months ago.  Awesome.  That cost us $300 out of pocket because our shitty health plan does not have a fucking ER co-pay.  So she's walking around with her spots circled in marker and we're hoping she successfully fights this off today and I don't have to take her in.  

She's pissy because she doesn't feel good and I'm pissy because I'm just pissy and today is going to be a good day.

Oh and last night Kid was being a smart ass at the table during dinner and correcting me... she's in that phase... you know the one that starts at 6 and ends at 96 where your children have to correct you.  It's ultra annoying.  Especially when they are wrong (I never am... right Mom?). Well I was informing her of how annoying it was and Baby looked at me across the table and said "Stop Talking And Eat Mom."  She was right... I was on the verge of losing my cool.  And then later when I was getting in bed with Kid to read to her I told her "I'm having a really bad day if you didn't notice."  It was kind of like an apology... right?  Yes that is what I thought.  And then she said "Yeah... you didn't even thank me."  Which was so ridiculous, and funny, and typically seven, that it actually cheered me for a minute.  I'm still not clear on what I was supposed to have thanked her for...

Valentines are In The Mail

I got this super cute set of retro Golden Books Valentines at Barnes & Noble for Kid to put together. Adorable. And they were shockingly under $5.
(Excuse the sideways photos... sometimes I hate Blogger)

Doppleganger

Wishing my gag order was lifted and with it my creative brain block? Me too.

Things I can tell you...

Last night I made Mr F spew chewed pretzels and water all over himself and the couch.

How?

Well, we were watching The Biggest Loser.

During the weigh-in Sherry (the pink team mom) starts toward the scale and Mr F says "She's the one I'm nervous for."

"Yeah, plus I like her." I say.

Then add...

"Cause I'd look like her if I was fat."

Right then the camera scanned her body.

And Mr F started laughing so hard he actually started throwing up.

Which was disgusting... but... also hilarious. And in part to get out of the range of fire but also because my body had gone limp with laughter I fell to the ground and lay there convulsing. Which only made his condition worsen. And I turned to look just as I saw another round of pretzel and water come propelling out of his mouth.

Of course what was so funny about this was that his immediate free flowing laugh attack was an undeniable open acknowlegement that YES that is what I would look like.

Which was kind of an insult.

But I had hit the nail so firmly on the head that any normal husband to wife filter was trumped and the truth came out... along with the pretzels.

And it couldn't have been funnier.

Making Amends

Dear Childcare Mom,

I am so sorry about this morning. Double the punishment for you... you had to see me with my Liza Minnelli morning hair!

Turns out someone (Baby) was playing with my alarm clock and reset it for 11.
Again, I am really sorry you all had to wait out in the cold. I'll credit you back $5 for today.

Mrs F

The Real Hoarder In The House

Hold Me

Are you as afraid of this as I am?

(I'd like to add all the usual disclaimers: #1 the rest of the house is clean and organized #2 this is our room of shame that has NEVER never worked in this house #3 recent events forced me to go through that craft/clothing closet in a hurried maniacal way resulting in what now appears before you #4 I'm afraid of paper)


What about this?

(That's baby hitting as close to me as allowed without actually hitting me.... Guess who told her to do it)



PROGRESS REPORT:
3 PM

5 PM
I'm onto the stuff that is less gratifying and more tedious (the paper)... I am losing steam

(I would like to note that that moving box has been under there SINCE WE MOVED. Ditto the two canvas bags... all of it paper work that of course I clearly don't need yet seem to have deemed necessary to keep.)
7 PM

It may not seem like there is much difference in this photo from the above... but there is. Lots of trashing and filing. That bag & box are filled with random old paperwork, checkbooks to closed accounts, art work, etc. This is where I usually give up and just clean off the desk and shove that stuff back underneath. I'm sticking it out this time.... just not today. It's now after 9, I've worked out and put the kids to bed. It's time to clean up the house before Monday AM rolls around. I'll finish this tomorrow! I swear!!