Saturday, November 24, 2007

Mrs F Takes You Christmas Shopping

As you may recall Mrs F hates shopping... well *real* shopping anyway. There is not a chance in Hell you would find me standing in line this weekend. There is no deal big enough... you couldn't even pay me to step into a store of any size. So I'm spending my free time compiling a list of potential gifts. Stay tuned.. and check back frequently.. I am going to find a gift for every person on my list. And with 4 siblings, in-laws, nieces and nephews the list will be long...

Something For All The Blogging Families You Know That Live In Old Homes That Have No Insulation

Something For Your Wife... If She Is a Brunette...And You Are Really Cheap...

Something For Your Sister and/or Older Neice

Something For Your Dad and/or Husband/Father Of Your Children/Serious Boyfriend... If They Like The National Geographic Channel

Something For Your Best "Mom" Friend

Something For Your Mom

Something For The Hairy Beast In Your Life

Something For the Perfectionist On Your List... Especially If They Are Crafty

Something For The Walker In Your Life... Who Is Either Paranoid and/or So Out Of Shape They Might Have A Heart Attack On Their Next Walk

Something For The Man In Your Life Who Loves The History Channel

Something For The Irresponsible College Student In Your Life

Something For That Special Someone... You Are Willing To Spend $150 On...Who Would Appreciate A Nostalgic Game In The Hands Down Coolest Format EVER

Something For Your Metrosexual Brother

Friday, November 23, 2007

Post Turkey Day Triumph... Kind Of

So if you've been obsessively checking my sidebar stats (and why would you not?!) you know I have not been working out AT ALL this week. One thing has snowballed into another all week. We've had friends and family visiting.. canceling their visits.. rescheduling their visits.. and actually visiting. This has meant that even my best laid plans have been thrown out of whack. And yes I could have made more of an effort and admittedly I did not.

I kind of enjoyed all the time off and found myself once again slipping out of my routine and slipping further and further away from reaching my week's goals. This has been happening more and more these last few weeks. I'm not totally sure what to make of it. Partly I've just been tired and partly I've been overwhelmed by all the things I have needed to do between Kid's birthday and Christmas. There is also a part of me that isn't that motivated to get off my ass. I'm done losing and it doesn't seem to matter how many hours I put in on the treadmill I've enter a comfortable weight and I'm not gaining it back.

So that's the good news. I'm maintaining. I'm eating 2000 calories a day and I actually lost a little this week. The bad news is that I'm tired and busy and ovewhelmed and I'm just not feeling that motivated. I know on the one hand that putting in my workout does a lot more than just help me maintain my weight... it helps me feel more energetic, more pulled together and less stressed.

So why oh why is it always so hard for me to stick with it? Why is it so easy to give into my lazy impulses.. and will it ever get easier? When I've had a stretch like this each day it gets harder to get back into my routine... and each day I'm reminded of how easily this could all slip away from me. It was honestly easier when I still had weight loss to motivate me. That seemed a more manageable and quantifiable and necessary goal. Ultimate fitness seems a little bit of a stretch.. something I don't really know how to measure or define... and something so long term that it can be overwhelming if not paralyzing. How do I fit it all in?

These days off have been such a nice reprieve and instead of watching TV and feeling badly about not working out I've stepped it up and actually used my time to knock off stressors from my To-Do lists. And maybe that is justified and necessary and okay to do every now and then... but when you are me... and you are a sabotager... how do you balance a need for a break from the routine without setting yourself up for failure and disappointment?

Today still suffering from a turkey... okay pie.... hangover I sucked it up. I faced every impulse to "take a nap", "have a hot shower", "you're tired", "it feels like Sunday", "you can do it tomorrow" and I put on my shoes and got on the treadmill anyway. I knew I had to make an effort that after 4 days off I was really pushing it and I needed to recommit and show myself that I can do it. To stop the negative self-talk and turn this ship around before it was too late. So I did... let's hope I can keep it up for the rest of the weekend.

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Happy Thanksgiving

Well today being Thanksgiving and all I thought I'd share a few things that I'm thankful for this year.

I'm thankful for this crazy crew...
Here they are in all their breakfast eating glory.. yes Canine Furious likes to pull up a chair his own self... he's part Bichon part Badass so what do you expect?!

I'm also thankful that I married a man who appreciates a nice table top..
and we were both pleased with this place setting... and ...NO... he says he isn't a closeted gay man just a designer...but thanks for asking!

In all seriousness (not that I'm not serious about Mr F loving the tablescape... I AM!) I am of course very thankful that both my girls are healthy, that Kid is seizure free, and that she takes her medicine like a champ (no more marshmallow rewards needed).

I am also so very thankful to all my readers. This blogging thing has been the most incredible experience. I feel so validated and supported and just plain liked (by adults even!) that I cannot even begin to express my gratitude. I appreciate all of you and have so loved getting to know you and having you in my life. I really do feel that I have made "real" friendships. Thank you!

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

This Move Was Brought To You By Mrs F

I like to call this move "The Hangman" but Mr F thinks "The Scarecrow" is better. Either way this is a perfect move to interject in the middle of a good "Robot".. really mixes things up and keeps your peeps guessing. This doesn't look as impressive in stills.. but believe me this move rocks!

Be sure you keep your arms perpendicular and perfectly still moving only from the elbow.. or you'll just look like a complete fool... don't say I didn't warn you!
Now you too can busta move like Mrs F this Thanksgiving!

More Mrs Furious Factoids

Yesterday Tina tagged me with this meme. So here you go... more fascinating lame Mrs Furious facts...
Don't worry Bi0nicw0man yours is next!

I give you money and send you into the grocery store to pick up 5 items. You can only pick one thing from the following departments.. what is it?

1. Produce: Broccoli
2. Bakery: Blueberry Muffin (just one... for me)
3. Meat: Pork Tenderloin
4. Frozen: Van's Hearty Oat Maple Fusion Waffles
5. Dairy: 1/2 & 1/2

Let's say we're heading out for a weekend getaway. You're only allowed to bring 3 articles of clothing with you. So, what's in your bag?

(you all know I'm just wearing what I have on today tomorrow anyway)
1. Underwear
2. Nursing Nightgown (no seriously it is HOT)
3. Socks

If I was to listen in on your conversations throughout the day, what 5 phrases or words would I be most likely to hear?

1. Where's Mama?.. Boo!
2. Thank You (yes... I'm surprisingly polite!)
3. Badass
4. Interesting...
5. That's Unusual

So, what 3 things do you find yourself doing every single day, and if you didn't get to do, you probably wouldn't be in the best mood?

1. Being with my kids
2. eating every 2 hours
3. laughing

We're talking a 3 hour block with nobody around. What 5 activities might we find you doing?

1. Talking on The Phone
2. Baking
3. Working Out
4. Reading
5. Writing a New Post

We are going to the zoo. But, it looks like it could start storming, so it'll have to be a quick visit. What 3 exhibits do we have to get to?

1. Elephants
2. Gorillas... Love to watch them nurse their babies... they actually nurse longer than Kid did!
3. Hippos

You just scored tickets to the taping of any show that comes on t.v. of your choice. You can pick between 4, so what are you deciding between?

(Honestly this doesn't really interest me... and I don't watch many shows with an audience... but I'll go along with this 1st pick...)
1. Oprah's Favorite Things

You're hungry for ice cream. I'll give you a triple dipper ice cream cone. What 3 flavors can I pile on for ya?

(Little known fact Mrs F doesn't love ice cream, but when I have it these are my top picks..)
1. Peppermint
2. Mint Chocolate Chip
3. Cookies and Cream

Somebody stole your purse/wallet…in order to get it back, you have to name 5 things you know are inside to claim it. So, what's in there?

1. Kid's Medicine
2. At Least 6 crumpled Target Receipts
3. Credit Card Wallet
4. Diaper (clean or dirty)
5. Used Kleenex

You are at a job fair, and asked what areas you are interested in pursuing a career in. Let's pretend you have every talent and ability to be whatever you wanted, so what 4 careers would be fun for you?

(Let's pretend I have every talent?!?)
1. FBI Agent
2. Lawyer
3. Life Coach
4. T.V. Chef

If you could go back and talk to the old you, when you were in high school, and inform yourself of 4 things, what would you say?

1. All those guys you think you are going to marry when you've only been dating 6 weeks... ummm... let's just say you don't...
2. Some things at home are going to get worse before they get better but you'll make it through
3. You do get to have the life you are hoping for
4. If you could just accept that you need to workout now you would save yourself a LOT of grief later on

You know me... I'll participate... but... this is where memes go to die! And yes I get that this is my passive aggressive way of acting out against authority.

Okay maybe that makes me sound bitchy? Well I am not bitchy... passive aggressive yes... but never bitchy! So I've changed my mind... I'm tagging eurydice and Heather... you both had it coming!

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

This Week The Plan

Well this morning I woke up to the Best Worst Day of my life. Baby had been up all through the night and I was exhausted. She got up early and Mr F was just getting up to get ready for work so he took her so I could sleep for another 20 minutes. This was one of those days where you are hoping that your spouse will read your telepathic signals (that you are fervently sending through your pillow) and call in sick. No such luck. I get up and groggily head downstairs. Kid?!?! Why are you up already?!?!... Uggh this is going to be a LONG day. I make my coffee and then I hear Mr F on the phone.. is he calling in sick... unbelievable! No.. he's not. His office just called to say there is a water main break and he doesn't need to come in. WHAT? You have got to be kidding me? This is GREAT.. oh wait.. this is terrible. Because even though Mr F is off I am not. Had he gotten the call only minutes earlier it might have worked out in my favor and I might have gotten to sleep in a bit. But once I'm up I'm up.. I'm one of those types. And now I've got to get through a day of making lunches, transporting to preschool, baby naps and grocery shopping. Oh and entertaining... our friends postponed their visit until today. And now I need to do it with an extra human in my way. Within moments of the news.. Mr F spilled his mug of coffee all over my brand new tablecloth... confirmation that his presence is not really a blessing but a curse.

HOLD UP.. I took a short break to run to the grocery store. It turns out there is some value in having Mr F home so I thought I'd throw him a morsel of gratitude (not that it was his choice mind you). Since he was home he took Kid and Baby to drop Kid off at school... allowing me to go to the store unaccompanied. "This will be a breeze" I think to myself on the drive over... "I'll be able to pound out both stores in an hour!" Then I pull into the parking lot.. er... I mean the parking lot of the store FOUR freaking stores away. Tuesday is my normal shopping day as you all know... what hadn't occured to me is that every buffoon in town was taking the day off to go shop for all their Thanksgiving needs at 11 AM.... with their spouses in hand... debating every damn thing they put in their carts (conveniently located in the middle of the aisle... thank you very much). So it took me TWICE as long to do my shopping and I really was thankful I didn't have the kids.
Plus I can write this now since I asked Mr F very nicely to unload the groceries for me. It went a little something like this "Mr F?!?! Aren't you going to unload my groceries!"

Now that I've gotten my whine out, here's my week in review...

This week wasn't so bad. I really made up for last week's miserable effort.
I've gotten some feedback about my tremendous organizational skills (and they weren't all in jest!). Here is the deal I am not completely incompetent.. my hurdle is really that I just resist authority so much that I don't want to give in to "order". If you have this issue also known as genius (of all sorts) you know what I am talking about.
My good friend got this giant Post It Note calender as a freebie at her job and sent it over.
At first I marveled at how incredibly wasteful this product seemed to be. Then I realized I could multipurpose it and not feel so bad about going through I huge wall sized piece of paper every week. I also have a main calender on which I write all our appointments for the month then I transcribe them over to this one just for the week's appointments. This calender is MUCH easier to read and I have it right by the phone so there is a greater likelihood that I'll actually pass by it each day. At the end of the week I rip it off and fold it up and use it for all my lists: grocery list, to do list, menu planning. It is big enough that I can have all my lists in one place and can fold it up to keep in my bag. Instead of a notebook (which I've tried to use in the past) I don't have to cart the whole thing around and I don't lose which page "I wrote all that important info on!". I can recycle it at the end of the week and move on with new lists... no ghosts of projects left on done to haunt me either! All in all I have found it to very helpful.

Getting back on topic... let's see I didn't do the pilates (damn me) but I did push out some super long cardio and even an extra cardio day. i know that is exactly what I said I would NOT do... but after our date on Friday I really want to have a little extra calorie burn to make up for my indiscretions. I did maintain my weight so I'm not sure my decision was all bad anyway.

I did my paperwork, cleaned, did the laundry and Mr F actually put it all upstairs for me. If there was something else I was supposed to do I don't remember what it was.. so how important was it really?

I think I pretty much followed the meal plan. I didn't waste any food (yay!) and I made all the meals.. maybe switched up the days a few times but that is it.

On to this week:

We are leaving next Wednesday for Disney World so I'm doing my plan through then as I don't intend to shop again.

Monday- Pork Tenderloin w/ Rice Pilaf and Vegetables

Tuesday - Beef Stew w/ Dumplings (leftover)

Wednesday - Pizza night (believe me I'll need it with T-day prep underway)

Thursday - Thanksgiving (I'm doing Sangria, biscuits, vegetables, appetizers)

Friday - Spaghetti & Homemade Meatballs w/ Steamed Broccoli

Saturday - Leftover Thanksgiving Stuff

Sunday - Shrimp Fried Rice

Monday - Salmon Noodle Casserole

Tuesday - Meatball Soup


Hmmmm.. I'm having extreme difficulty giving up cardio days to make room for pilates days. I want to I really do but to be honest I know with the Holiday, Kid being off school, and preparing for our trip I'm going to need the stress relief of the cardio so I'm not even going to set myself up for failure on this one. I plan to do 5 days of cardio, 60 minutes minimum each day.


Thanksgiving is being held at our house... so.. pretty much everything needs to be cleaned... in two days!

To Do:

vomit.. maybe just a little in my throat
roll around moaning (and not in a "that's sexy" kind of way in a "dying animal" kind of way)
become paralyzed by all the things I'm not doing
complain... excessively
get really mad at Mr F.. possibly threaten to divorce him over major issues like dishes and toilet cleaning...
cry.. a little

What do you think I just caught Mr F doing?!? He was about to have some hummus on his sandwich. "What's wrong with that?" You might ask.. well... I just bought that goddamn hummus for one of our appetizers. And when I caught him in the act .. he said "I'm just going to have a little" A LITTLE!?!? I'm serving that!.. Which means I don't want a big fucking hunk taken out of the goddamn middle of it! Put your knife down Mr F because "a little" isn't one of your goddamn choices! Jesus Christ! Go back to work Mr F before we have to have a throw down!

Monday, November 19, 2007

Documenting the Truth

It is 9 AM and this is what my house looks like...

Stay tuned...

As if to mock me this is all they could muster today...

I am in utter disbelief. This was taken at 6:30 PM and this is the BEST my house has ever looked after a full day of playing.

Sunday, November 18, 2007


So I am sitting here looking at this..

Yeah, that would be the same damn pile of shit that I have been complaining about for the last two weeks... only bigger.
And now we are having some guests coming over tomorrow and I actually have to do something about it. But I'm not.. I'm blogging about it instead...because even though in the amount of time I have spent on this I could have at the very least separated out the GARBAGE... I can't. Yet. Okay I'm giving myself 1 hour. I'll update with a finished photo at 8:05 PM.

Funnily enough when I downloaded the photo I found this little ditty...
Hmmm me thinks Mr F was planning some kind of blogging retaliation... can't wait to see how this is going down...


Mission Accomplished

Picture This

Mr F is standing at the sink... I am toasting my waffles when somthing catches my eye: his midsection. I grab the camera and subtly try and take a few shots of his gut.

"What are you doing?" Mr F asks

"Nothing" I respond

"Are you taking pictures for my shirt?" Mr F asks

(okay...yeah if that's what you want to think... really I'm snapping some "before" shots without permission)

"I know it looks dorky, I don't ever tuck my shirts in... have you seen me tuck in my shirts except when I'm wearing a suit?" Mr F continues in a defensive tizzy

"What's going on?" Kid asks

"Mom's trying to start some trouble but she doesn't know that I'm already riled up" Mr F replies

Oooh I'm scared...
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