Saturday, April 14, 2012

It Turns Out...

I don't really enjoy managing all the clean up/restoration work that has been going on for the past month.

In fact, I find dealing with all of the contractors, subcontractors, laborers and the whole insurance component to be one of the most stressful jobs I've had to undertake.

I don't think, even if I did get to control the timeline, cost, or work being done, I'd enjoy this.

The reality is that I don't get to control any of the above, and well... I pretty much hate it.

Insurance is the final word, and "you get what you get and you don't throw a fit".

It's all of the negatives of a major home renovation, with absolutely none of the positives.

Put all that stress right on the back of the most traumatic event in my life...

(just because you live through something, does not mean you think you will at the time... and that took a pretty serious psychological toll on me and I'm still working through that, not to mention the PTSD that makes sleeping nearly impossible... as I'm always listening for wind... or just dealing with regular weather patterns without anxiety.. it's hard)

and... I'm at my breaking point.

It just seems unfair that you have to live through both the destruction and then the construction.

Of course, Mr F is rarely here... wasn't here when it hit and is not here for the construction.

It's a lot to manage on my own.

And I've passed my ability to handle it well.


Supermom said...

I'm so sorry Mrs F. If I was there I'd give you a big hug.

I cannot imagine how scared you were and the girls and Matt because he wasn't there.

I hope that in time, after the house is physically fixed, that you can find some peace with what happened.

Thinking about you.

Torey said...

I'm so sorry. I cannot imagine what you're going through.

Let me know if there is anything I can do.

Kim said...

Insurance is sort of you get what you get and you don't throw a fit. You can always appeal an insurance decision. We had a flood at a business I ran, and I threw a fit with insurance and ended up with twice the original amount they offered. The worst they will do is say no - if you think you're not getting what you should, talk to a supervisor, etc.


Julie said...

The tornado hitting you guys...that's something that is supposed to happen to other unfortunate people you read about in the paper. It is so real now. It hit you guys. You must have been so scared. I always try to find some 'rhyme or reason' as to why bad things happen to some people to rationalize why it could not happen to me. But there is none. You don't live someplace that I think of as Tornado alley, you don't live in a trailer park (I don't say that with disrespect to those who do, it just seems they get hit more often).

The whole feeling of being out of control with everything must be so stressful.

I hope things will feel better soon. Just getting the house back together again will be a good first step.

My love goes out to you all. I wish there was more I could do.

HC said...

Hang in there, lady. You're going to get through this.

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