Friday, December 21, 2012

It's So Hard For Me To Say Anything

People, I am just devastated by the Newtown School Shooting.

It's hard for me to feel that anything else is worth mentioning, right now.  I am so heartbroken for those parents.  I am deeply saddened that anyone would ever have to contemplate such a horrific, terrifying, death.  I am so overwhelmed by it myself. My heart is wrenched by the thought of their terror filled last moments.  It's breaking me down.  It is the worst thing I can imagine.

My girls are a constant reminder.  My own Charlotte, barely a few months younger.

Everything I do, as a parent, all day, reminds me of how profound their loss is.

Doing laundry... and I stop and think how they will do their laundry and find some of their precious child's clothes in the pile.

Put my girls to bed... and know that their child's bed remains empty.

It's such a horrible grief... and I feel that I need to honor it by not forgetting.

By not putting small things above the weight of their lost lives.


wootini said...

I understand, Mrs. F - this is weighing on me so much as well. I find it hard to hold back tears throughout the day. This post helped:

Hugs to you and yours.


Torey said...

I'm so glad to hear someone else say this.

I said to Mr. Torey the other day "Look around us. The kids are EVERYWHERE in this house, it would be awful to look around and know they weren't coming home."

I heard a story that a parent's alarm went off to remind them about scouts while they were waiting to hear about their children, and the whole room went silent. My phone does that. It beeps to tell me to get the kids. I. Cannot. Imagine.

I'm overwhelmed by the feelings. Dropping my kids off at school has been terrible for me.

Brenda said...

Yes. It is overwhelming. I find myself in tears from reminders all the time. The moment of silence we honored on Friday at work left me sobbing uncontrollably. There are no words for this type of heartbreak.

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