Friday, May 3, 2013

Haters Gonna Hate

You know it's funny....  I thought about how controversial my FUCK YOU post would be to some sensitive readers.  Obviously, not everyone swears (although the vast majority do), but I think most people understand that they are said... and upon occasion they are repeated by children.  And if you don't take yourself to seriously, well, it is pretty damn funny when it happens.

Seeing as I hardly ever blog I find it reasonably amazing that anyone still reads it, so I thank you for the audience.  I am blown away that someone who vehemently disagrees with everything I say and do reads it.  But I guess that is a compliment of some sort.  I never did understand that impulse, I just couldn't fill my day looking for that kind of negativity.  

You know what Tony Robbins says... if you are having trouble with a relationship in your life, you should change your participation or change your perception.

So, considering that this is clearly an ongoing and vexing relationship (to you)... maybe stop reading? Mull it over.  Your readership has no effect on my day (especially as I wasn't aware of it), but it seems to really upset yours.  

But I can see the level of hate you feel toward me... it's very similar to how I feel about Adam Lanza... so I get it.  That seems like a perfectly reasonable amount of hate to have toward a stranger that has absolutely nothing to do with and no bearing on you or your life.  

The funny thing is... if you ever saw me and my kids at the park or the grocery store you would have a mad crush on us.  For real.  You don't know a family that is more kind, generous, and loving, with a desire and impulse to serve others and treat people with respect.  You just don't.

Now, I should be clear that I would NEVER let my children communicate in the way you have in these comments.  I'm raising them better than that.  But saying FUCK YOU in the car, by ourselves... yeah... I'm gonna laugh to myself... remind her that that isn't an appropriate word and move on.

Maybe you should, too?







22 comments:

Nutmeg said...

yeah.. I just don't get the desire to read stuff that annoys you. I have dropped out of forums I enjoyed participating in because every once in a while I would come across something I didn't like so I gave up otherwise rewarding interactions. Of course, I've been participating in online conversations and discussion for more than 20 years (Oh DEAR)... so maybe I got out all my annoying online stranger rage when I was an adolescent... you know. When it's appropriate.

We all know about your random acts of kindness, teaching your girls about how to be good a people and good citizens.

As you say, haters gonna hate. Some times I guess people just need a place to funnel their real life misery maybe.

Smitty said...

From now on, I am totally taking everything you say at face value.

I'm going to text Mr F as often as possible with my perceptions of the failings of his wife the impending doom of his children.

This should be fun.

lindalou said...

I know. I am a troll, an adolescent...because i commented on a public blog because the blog author had put in quotation marks what her SIX year old said.

I would love her in real life because she is a kind good citizen but behind closed doors she is saying these things in front of her children

One of her children can barely cope in society

20 page notes are being sent to the teacher.

I know its all me
Do not post stuff if you do nott want people to read it

You are not beyond reproach

Make your blog private if you just want your cronies to tell you how funny and cute you are

Violent statements with vulgarity toward the tree trimmer are not cute and/or funny

With all that is happening now in our country you need to reread what you wrote and if you are proud of that than you have serious problems

If your friends think your funny than wow i just dont get it
Its not funny. That is it. That is all.

Defend it, say i am communicating in an offensive way with you

Sic your husband on me so he can call me a fucker like he did the last time and tell me to shut the fuck up and it is no surprise that your 6 year old says these things.

Mrs Furious said...

linda,
I'm sorry, but I don't remember who you are.
Clearly you need something from me, as you seem to have given me, and my words, a lot of power in your life.

Honestly, I think making debasing comments about my children kind of undermines the validity of any of your arguments.

Julie said...

lindalou,
1. With all that is happening in our country right now (I'm assuming you mean by the shootings, the bombing in my hometown, etc), why on earth would you trouble yourself with a few swear words.

2. You must be fortunate to not have much else to worry about in your life if you go to blogs you don't even like & then get angry at the owner of the blog and her readers/friends. I don't say this in a mean tone. I'm serious. People in this world--myself included--have real problems going on and don't have the time or desire to seek out what you are doing. Why seek out something that upsets you?There are more worthwhile things to be doing or be concerned about.

3. I am so offended that you would bring up Mrs. F's older child and say 'she can barely cope in society.' You have NO idea what's really going on for that child. I'm disgusted that you would go there. One of my children can barely cope in society. You have no clue as to how agonizing, challenging, heartbreaking, all-encompassing it is to be witness and to love this child. Have you ever read my blog? You want to tell me that swearing caused my child to have Autism Spectrum Disorder? And the Anxiety Disorder that is co-morbid because of it? I keep my blog Public just in case there is someone else out there suffering and looking to connect. Not disparage. I always tell my kids that we are here to build others up, not tear them down. To support.

This woman, Mrs F, was that person for me many, many years ago...just another mom out there looking to connect, to feel not alone when mothering little ones. I found her & she took me in. She has been there for me more than anyone I know. So it makes me so sad, not angry, that someone who really doesn't know her or her family would take the time out of our one precious life to take her down.

Please just walk away, don't read. You certainly have a right to your opinion, but no one here is asking for it.

Krista said...

Hey, actually coming out of lurking for this. Mrs. F, I stumbled across your blog years ago and instantly recognized what a great parent you are. I love that you let your kids be themselves, through devoting so much of your own time and effort into enabling their dreams to come true (my DH and I absolutely adored baby's birthday cake and it was the most caring and awesome birthday cake I've ever seen a parent make), and through teaching them how special and incredible they are when other people and test methods and medical issues are trying to drag them down. Your post about kid's math scores once you started home schooling her just blew me away, and you and Mr F are so incredible for taking such care and making massive lifestyle changes to try to find the best educational fit for baby and kid.

I'm constantly seeing you and Mr F make decisions that are better than the ones my parents and other parents I know have made, and any kid would be incredibly lucky to have a parent like you supporting them. Your letter to kid's teacher was also awesome, (and is the type of letter my younger sister would really have benefited from if it had been sent to a couple of her teachers when she was at school), I'm glad the school was made aware of that teacher's outdated teaching expectations, and I'm still interestedly standing by for a post about what happened with the principal... and also for that recipe you mentioned once, the one where Mr. F keeps saying he loves it every time you cook it. Your fajitas recipe is still one of our favorites. It just shows how insane the internet is that we've never even talked directly, but your recipes and the amazing personalities of your kids (they're so witty and confident and funny and kind), and the parenting practices that I'm making mental notes of for the future when DH and I have kids have had such an impact on our lives over the past few years. You even handled a troll well. You're just awesome. :)

Mrs Furious said...

Krista,
Thank you so much! You know, this has been an awesome experience. A long way back if someone attacked me I would feel terrible, and it would effect me for days. This time I read it and was like "whoa that is some seriously misplaced anger" which is pretty ironic considering the post topic, and I was able to laugh at how obviously this woman does not know me. (and wonder more than a bit about what is missing from her life) I finally have been able to believe in the goodness of myself and not need strangers to recognize it in order for it to be true. Your comment is the icing on the cake. I feel that in being able to be open enough to be judged I've been open enough to be seen and loved. And I'll take that. Thank you so much.


Smitty,
You guys need to come over for dinner some weekend and tell him in person :)


Julie,
Hugs to you Julie, I was thinking of you when I read her comment. I love you and maybe one day Mr F will get a job in Boston and we can corrupt our kids together.

Julie said...

Hug to you, too.

whoa that is some seriously misplaced anger" which is pretty ironic considering the post topic, and I was able to laugh at how obviously this woman does not know me. (and wonder more than a bit about what is missing from her life) I
Yes! I was thinking that, too. I mean, really? Baby swearing is the scariest, most violent thing on the web?

We could homeschool our kids together:). And write letter to each other about how much better we are than Kid's teacher. I think Mr. F is going to have to put up a self-marketing campaign like his old boss though in order to get a job in Boston. We like naked guys with boxes over their junk. Instant hire.

I better go join my family. This has been so much fun!

I fucking love you, too. (Sorry Katie!!!!!:) Ignore my swearing)

Mr Furious said...

Wow. Just, wow.

Once upon a time (and I just went back and read a few) I would roll my sleeves up grab the keyboard, and let the lambasting posts loose.

But guess what? I don't have the energy to waste on a worthless loser who sits silently on the sidelines of our lives, judging, and throwing bombs when she hears something she doesn't like while eavesdropping.

I'll just say this... I'm impressed. I don't know how you manage to keep up with Mrs F's and what surely must be hundreds of other blogs, websites, magazines, books, movies, and shows that must also torment you, yet you cannot tear yourself away from... Especially considering how much time you must spend in all of those porno shops and strip clubs you must visit simply because they are there... Squeezing all that in between the abortions we liberals are forcing you to endure...all the time you must spend defending your marriage against an onslaught of attacking homosexuals...

I'll find comfort in the fact that my not remembering who the hell you are and when and over what I told you to "shut the fuck up, fucker" is probably more vexing to you than anything I might come up with tonight.

I hope typing out the f-word so much was sufficiently titillating for you!

Amy said...

Delurking to say I'm a long time reader and I love the Furious family!! Fucking-A! I am also a mom to 2 girls around the same age as the furious girls and I keep coming back because Mrs F.'s writing comes across as genuine, sincere and well thought out. She doesn't take herself too seriously, and neither should you lindalou. Lighten up!!

Mrs Furious said...

Amy,
Oh, thank you for commenting, I appreciate it and your readership!

Mrs Furious said...

Krista,
do you know what recipe it was? I think it might be this amazing curry/chutney/honey baked chicken... which if it wasn't... it should be.... because we could eat it everyday and be happy. Everyone loves it (even Baby which is saying something). I'll post it and the principal update (which went well) this week. I hope...

julie said...

I fell in love with Mr. F all over again.
Word to everything you said.
I also found it intriguing that for someone so offended by the naughty language seemed to enjoy re-writing everyone's f-bombs.

Amy--
Fucking-A! LOL!



Krista said...

I think it was the Tortellini bake you mentioned in a January post. I was sold when you said: "we have this once a week, Mr F says "Oh I love this dinner!" every single time like it's the first time he's ever had it..." The curry/chutney/honey baked chicken one sounds really good too, though... Thank you!

Mrs Furious said...

Krista,
Oh, okay... That is almost embarrassingly simple. I'll put it out. We have had it once a week for months & it makes great lunch leftovers. But the chicken is super good... I'll post that too.

Krista said...

Mrs. F,
Wow, thanks, I really appreciate it. :D Quick and simple but delicious is the best combination. For the chicken fajitas recipe, I loved your tip of keeping a fajitas seasoning jar in the cupboard, 'cause now whenever I make them I can cook everything in the time it takes to cook the rice. That coupled with how delicious they are every time has made them one of our favorite recipes. We cooked them once for my inlaws, and my step-father-in-law liked them so much we actually made them as a surprise for his birthday one year. I felt like we were copping out because they were so easy to make, but he loved it. For some reason what you said about the tortellini bake made me think it might be a recipe that stands the test of time just as well, which is why it stuck in my mind. Really looking forward to both your recipe posts now. :)

Andrea said...

Wow,I missed all the drama. Why does she waste her time. I really love reading every fucking thing you write.You are someone I look up to and someone I'm happy to call a"Friend". lots of love Furious Family. I can't wait to get these recipes as well several of your recipes are already in our regular rotation.

Mrs Furious said...

Thank you Andrea! I think of you nearly every single day since we have tons of pictures of Baby in your daughter's hand-me-downs in the living room.

Supermom said...

I go away for ONE night and look what I come back to?!?!?

What the fuck have you been doing?

*wink*

Since I've met your lovely family IRL and even had a mini vacation with you at the beach I know you are top notch parents and I'm honored to call you my friend.

Even though you moved and left me.

I forgive you.

xoxox,
Michelle

Jaime said...

Personally I would stop reading if you stopped saying Fuck. Not enough people say Fuck on the interwebs. xo

Mrs Furious said...

Thank you, supermom. We miss all of you! You guys are such a kind and welcoming family!


jamie,
I will never fucking let you down. :)

Peta Mayer said...

Hi Mrs F. Long-time, sporadic reader. I've always loved your sense of humour and think that you're an amazing mother with a great relationship to her incredible kids and family.

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