Mrs. Furious ... Recipes, Rants & Reality: Video Update

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Video Update

22 comments:

Colleen said...: You might want to talk to her about a "late fee" in addition to letting her know why it's important for you that she be on time (it's also possible she's just seeing this as a more informal thing, but better safe than sorry). Many daycares charge by the MINUTE after the cut off time (and they also charge by the week, not the hour, like you're doing). Either the financial incentive to be on time will motivate her...or you'll make extra money! From what you described before, you are giving her a killer deal, and she shouldn't take advantage of you. Just a thought.; June 23, 2009 at 3:48 PM
lucinda said...: I think that new baby hormones can turn even the most efficient focused time manager into a lump. She'll be going to work so she can't be too off the mark. And I agree with Colleen that a late fee is a great idea. I'd just wait until it's a problem before you hit her with it.; June 23, 2009 at 4:03 PM
Mrs Furious said...: Well she came (45 minutes late.. just saying) and I actually feel better. While on the one hand her husband, now, doesn't have a job so they don't know when/how much they'll need me. (They are hoping he's got a job by then.) On the other hand she said she'd like me to bring the baby to school when Ruby gets out at 3, instead of her coming and getting him at 4.... so her lateness should not be a factor. I can assure you I'll be on time ;)
Also.... bonus... he's actually a very attractive baby. And Charlotte didn't try to kill him.; June 23, 2009 at 4:21 PM
Nutmeg said...: In total agreement and I think you could either talk about being late now or later if it's a problem. If we pick eli up late (granted it's a daycare so they close at 6 so late is way later than I pick him up, except the one time my car broke down two miles from daycare!) they charge us for the first 15 minutes and then they charge us for every 5 minutes after that (I don't know how much because I've never been late). And if you are later than X amount of time you have been considered to have abandoned your child! That's incentive right there!

Also, we pay for days he's absent in a week, except for 10 tuition free days (we inform them a week in advance that we will be taking tuition free days that week and we pay less the days he won't be there). So, just for clarity, she's probably getting a great deal with you and she'd be dumb to not see that.; June 23, 2009 at 4:23 PM
Nutmeg said...: Well that all sounds promising... you can maybe get eased into watching the baby (while dad searches for a job) and baby won't tear him from limb to limb! haha!

Bringing him with you will be good. I'm sure she'll have afterschool meetings some days that she should be sure to tell you about in advance!; June 23, 2009 at 4:25 PM
Mrs Furious said...: She said initially that they'd pay $200/week (40 hours). There has been no clarification on if that is $40 a day and so I only get paid on the days that he's there or if it's $200/week whether there is a half day of school or not. We've got to hammer that out. I think that I'll have a higher rate that I'll charge for time (late or just above the regular agreement) by the half hour. But for now I'm really hoping it works out to drop him off with her.
I feel she getting a good deal for a 2 on 1 care scenario. We also haven't worked out diapers/food costs. I do want to sit down and be thorough and upfront because I know I have a tendency to get myself in a situation that I resent... and I don't want that or need that added stress!; June 23, 2009 at 4:56 PM
Rob said...: Have her bring diapers and wipes. When my kids were in day care we had to bring those....; June 23, 2009 at 5:16 PM
Torey said...: Two words: nanny contract. You need one. Google it there are samples online.; June 23, 2009 at 5:44 PM
HC said...: Oh yes, I am totally with those advising a written contract -- not that I have any experience in this area whatsoever...but handing someone a piece of paper that outlines exactly what you expect and what they are agreeing to, is a very powerful way to clear up any confusion asap, and set up the border between the personal and the professional.

And it makes you look like a Real Simple-subscribing ROCK STAR.

:)

Good luck on the road trip!; June 23, 2009 at 7:21 PM
HC said...: Oh, and how sweet is it that you and Mr. F are all crushing on each other... :); June 23, 2009 at 8:20 PM
Mrs Furious said...: Haley,
Mr F is always crushing on me. ;)

(right Mr F?!!!!)

Torey,
I know you are a pro so I'm going to look into it.

Robyn,
That's what I was thinking... otherwise I need to raise my price. She did ask me about cloth diapers... and while I'm willing to do that I might have to charge extra if I need to wash them.; June 23, 2009 at 9:41 PM
Nutmeg said...: Mrs F... there's no way she would ask you to wash her cloth diapers, you wouldn't have enough from a single day to justify a load.

I use cloth and don't trust even my husband to wash the diapers!

don't be afraid of cloth, I send eli to daycare with cloth that is pretty much JUST like disposables, (one piece, velcro etc.) the only difference being they don't throw them away. I bring enough diapers for the day, I bring a wetbag and I leave with the wetbag and all the used diapers inside!

Even if she is using more complicated seeming diapers like prefolds and covers, two days diapering a baby with them and it will barely seem difficult at all!

Good luck on your trip! You are BRAVE!; June 23, 2009 at 11:19 PM
inkelywinkely said...: Okay.. I made some carnitas last night.

I was just instructed this morning:

"The next time you put fruit near meat I am going to...I am going to FUCK YOU UP."

LOL. ahahahah

Men.; June 24, 2009 at 7:45 AM
inkelywinkely said...: It is safe to say that carnitas were a complete failure.

I have now been informed that the meat is going to be sold to Haitians, to use in spells since the meat is pretty much pork dust, after being crisped in the oven after shredded.

OMG.. so sue me, I tried to make add some variety to our diets.

No more recipes from sources I cannot strangle. :D

Have you ever had a similar situation, Mrs. F?; June 24, 2009 at 7:50 AM
wootini said...: Mrs. F, I hope you have a fantastic trip! Good luck! If you need a place to stop in the DC area (VA side), just let me know.

For what it's worth, I have some thoughts on the childcare perspective from both sides. While my first child was young, I watched a neighbor's kid after school and during holidays/teacher workdays, etc. And then since I've gone back to work full time outside the home, I've had a couple of different home-based childcare providers in addition to regular daycare.

Both of my home-based providers require signed contracts outlining all kinds of specifics. I can send you a copy of one if you'd like. I think it is incredibly smart to do this - it helps avoid any future conflicts or misunderstandings about hours, late fees, who is responsible for diapers/wipes, etc.

Back at the time when I was watching my neighbor's kid (they have since moved away), I thought that since it was just one child, I didn't really need to get into all that with a contract, etc. Well, in the time I was watching her I wished a million times over that I had thought it through in advance and put together a contract. The mom would come home late, or call and say she was stopping to pick up groceries - and since we had left it fairly open ended I didn't feel like I could impose changes after the fact. Think carefully about things like food costs when you are setting your fees too. I would do everything you can to set up the arrangement well in advance, so that you won't end up feeling resentful or taken advantage of (as I did) and can enjoy that sweet little baby!

$200/week sounds low to me for an infant - I have paid close to that for afterschool care alone, FYI.

YOU should set the daily or weekly rate, and make it clear to her. In all the daycares I have attended you pay for the week whether you use it or not. If my kids are sick and have to stay home or we go on vacation, we still pay. That has been universally true in all the care situations I've used (think about it, you are paying for a spot, not just the care). Some providers will do daily rates or part weeks, but the rates are usually higher. In addition, my providers' contracts have also spelled out holidays and discretionary days off. We pay for holidays, and one has a certain number of paid vacation days written into the contract, the other doesn't.

On the plus side, when the relationship and expectations are clear, home based care is the best solution I have found. My daughter (5 yrs) kept a 'journal' at school this year, which she brought home last week when school ended. One entry, written just after a school holiday that she spent in the care of her old home-based provider, went something like: "I am at Ms. Deby's (sic). Ms. Deby, Ms. Deby, I love love love you." I scanned it and sent it to her provider. You could really play a wonderful role in this baby's childhood... just make sure your needs are covered too.

Sorry for the long comment and likely assvice... but I thought maybe you could benefit in some way from my experience.; June 24, 2009 at 12:08 PM
inkelywinkely said...: I dunno about costs... I used to keep two small children under the age of three for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, including breakfast and lunch, drinks, etc, and I charged $20 a day. For another family, when watching one child, I only charged $15 a day...

Prices for in home care are expected to be MUCH cheaper than day care down here. Remember...this isn't Michigan. Especially if she is a teacher. The south pays much less than our northern counterparts.; June 24, 2009 at 5:07 PM
wootini said...: inkleywinkley, that is crazy low! wow!

Mrs. F, it might not be a bad idea to do some sleuthing around & call other providers or centers to get an idea of the price range in your area.; June 24, 2009 at 5:49 PM
Mrs Furious said...: Inkelywinkely,
That is ridiculously low.
We're in a pretty affluent area so the 200/week is low here. The only reason I agreed to it is because I don't want to have to work on Kid's school holidays and she'll have all the same ones off... so the flexibility allowed me to agree to less than I would have asked. If I got someone else who worked year round I'd make more but I'd also be tied down more than I really want to be.

Wootini,
Thank you for your comment. That is super informative and I will go ahead and write up some kind of contract with them. I agree that I'd rather have things hammered out so there is no awkwardness/resentment/misunderstandings later on.; June 24, 2009 at 6:02 PM
inkelywinkely said...: Sounds like you will get it. :)

You can handle near bouts anything, girl.; June 24, 2009 at 6:16 PM
inkelywinkely said...: Thought this may help you:

http://www.daycarecouncil.org/contract.pdf; June 24, 2009 at 6:17 PM
Mrs Furious said...: Wootini,
Oh thank you for the offer. We're staying in Winchester. IS that near you? We should be getting in around dinner time (God willing!!). Anyway, if you are close by let me know I'd love to meet you.; June 24, 2009 at 8:28 PM
wootini said...: So close and yet so far... Winchester is about 1.5 hours from the DC area, depending on traffic. Boo! :( I would love to meet you - and give you a respite from crazy Baby after all those hours on the road.

You'll have to take a road trip to DC sometime when Baby is a little older!

Hope you guys are having a great time.

Emily; July 1, 2009 at 8:06 AM

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