Ouch

This morning I rubbed Baby's back.
I've been trying to give in more to her cuddly neediness. It'll end. And she obviously needs me more than I sometimes think.
She's an interesting dichotomy that way.

While I rubbed her back I thought of preschool.

And the fact that she's three now, not the baby we let her pretend to be most of the time.

I thought, maybe, it was time to start introducing her to her name.

You know... how to write it.

It's not her fault that her name is the longest name in the history of the world.

Good God I think back to the nervous breakdown Kid had when she had to master her name for preschool and her name is only 4 letters. Nine letters?! What the hell were we thinking.

That's why I thought maybe we should start now. Give it some time to sink in.

I grabbed a notebook and started to write her name. Then scribbled it out remembering too late that little kids start with all capital letters.

So I wrote her name several times and then made dotted letters for her to outline.

She was pretty outraged.

"Those are not ABCs!" Baby said agitated.

"Yes, they are." I reply then start to trace one for her "See? You write on top of them to make your letters."

"I want them to Shut Up." Baby says showing a disgruntled attitude usually associated with her older sister.

"Shut up?" I ask slightly confused... you know cause the letters aren't really talking... but, hey, either were my windows.

"Yeah." Baby replies.

"What do you mean, shut up?" I ask.

"It means you shut your mouth." Baby replied with contempt.

Alrighty then.

She might not be ready for preschool but she'll fit right in with the mean girls in high school.

Mr F Is Going To Try And Deny This...

But he watches The Bachelor.

Don't pay any attention when he chimes in to say "Not really... I'm just trying to spend time with Mrs F and she watches it." or "It certainly isn't what I would chose to watch." or some other lame excuse.

Don't believe a word he says. He doesn't just watch it... He's into it.

Last night Mr F declared...

"If he doesn't chose Tenley I'm boycotting the final episode."

The proof is in the pudding, my friends.

Weekend Update... More Of "Ahh That Feels Better"

Before:

After:
Don't mind those drying sweaters. Once we finish this room tonight I'll change the pictures out. The color of this room is not one we chose... do not judge. It's more like the top picture than the bottom.

The other side of the room has my desk (cleaned off) and two closets. We still have my small Hoosier baking cabinet in here and that is going down to the basement tonight. More pictures later.
And for those of you worried about the shared desk situation... problem solved:

Sucks to be you, Mr F (don't worry about him it's warm by the furnace)

Girls' Room:
Sadly, I do not have a before shot. You've probably seen it before. Mr F and I love this room but usually it looks like a cyclone just went through it. I got rid of 3 circle area rugs and moved the bigger rag rug. I got rid of 2 huge pink stuffed animal bins and replaced them with 3 under the bed storage containers on rollers (they were $9.99 each and they are slightly taller than typical yet less deep so they fit easily side by side perpendicular to the bed frame). One has the majority of their dress up stuff. Remember the dress up corner behind the door?... yes... we needed to minimize that for showings. Gone also is their pink dress up chest. So some serious decluttering went into this room and it looks fantastic.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Yet another year wherein Mr F gives me a sentimental card and I give him one like this...

Finally

Sure I'm getting ready to leave this house. But I finally figured out a good window treatment for those side windows that overlook our screened in porch. They've been the bane of my decorating existence because I needed something that didn't clash with the velvet drapes I already had... and I didn't want to spend more than a couple of bucks... and I needed something that could completely block out the sun as these are East facing windows. The velvet drapes are actually a deep dusty grape color the new roman style shades are brown sail cloth. Whatever. Close enough. I've spent close to 2 years trying to find curtains that were a closer match and I'm over it. All of our doors are a very dark brown stain and they match that. I got the new rod and shades for about $30. I feel pretty good about it.

Good News

Mr F and I have settled on a plan of action. The past couple of weeks have been stressful and some words have been expressed (to put it gently).  I think we have a better understanding about how we all feel and we have been able to apply that knowledge to a good resolution.  I am feeling greatly relieved.  We all are.  

Now hopefully the procrastination can come to an end.

Today we are tackling some house projects and moving our house forward.  

Expect greatness mediocrity (or at least not trash covering the floor) out of our office... I hope.

I'm also doing a major cull on the girls' room and toy shelves in our living room... this is always a sensitive special ops project.  Thank God it snowed again and I can banish them out for a bit.  Of course when I did that yesterday I ended up being summoned to the back yard by Baby's screams... running through the snow in my socks mind you... apparently Kid "accidentally" (accidentally on purpose) hit her in the face with a large stick.  She looks like she was in an alley fight.  Thankfully for Kid she doesn't hold a grudge.  

That's all for now...

Mr F is starting on his side of the office.

Pray for us...

Bitch Fest Friday

... because it's been awhile and I need it.

People, I am really suffering right now.  I'm having so many feelings that I feel like I want to explode with the biggest tantrum of all time.  One thing that sucks about having kids is that you have to hold yourself together.  And right now that is hard.  

You know how when you were in school and you had finals and you had 4 major papers you had to write with a million references footnoted (and this was in the days of researching on microfiche!!!) and you were procrastinating and waiting until about the last possible minute to start (36 hours before it was due... on a good day).  And you got all ready to get down to business and then suddenly you were so inexplicably tired.  You could not stay awake.  You know it isn't helping matters but it's like you've been struck with procrastination induced narcolepsy.  

Was that just me?

Well THE SAME SHIT is going down right now.  I keep falling asleep... and, people, I do not fall asleep.  I never took a nap the entire time I had a newborn.  I am hardcore.  And here I am yesterday sound asleep with Baby putting a crown on my head and slapping me in the face with a diaper.  

I just cannot deal with how out of control I feel and I am shutting down.

Oh and yesterday Baby got one of those giant hives that aren't hives but some more severe allergic reaction that landed her in the ER a couple of months ago.  Awesome.  That cost us $300 out of pocket because our shitty health plan does not have a fucking ER co-pay.  So she's walking around with her spots circled in marker and we're hoping she successfully fights this off today and I don't have to take her in.  

She's pissy because she doesn't feel good and I'm pissy because I'm just pissy and today is going to be a good day.

Oh and last night Kid was being a smart ass at the table during dinner and correcting me... she's in that phase... you know the one that starts at 6 and ends at 96 where your children have to correct you.  It's ultra annoying.  Especially when they are wrong (I never am... right Mom?). Well I was informing her of how annoying it was and Baby looked at me across the table and said "Stop Talking And Eat Mom."  She was right... I was on the verge of losing my cool.  And then later when I was getting in bed with Kid to read to her I told her "I'm having a really bad day if you didn't notice."  It was kind of like an apology... right?  Yes that is what I thought.  And then she said "Yeah... you didn't even thank me."  Which was so ridiculous, and funny, and typically seven, that it actually cheered me for a minute.  I'm still not clear on what I was supposed to have thanked her for...

Valentines are In The Mail

I got this super cute set of retro Golden Books Valentines at Barnes & Noble for Kid to put together. Adorable. And they were shockingly under $5.
(Excuse the sideways photos... sometimes I hate Blogger)

Doppleganger

Wishing my gag order was lifted and with it my creative brain block? Me too.

Things I can tell you...

Last night I made Mr F spew chewed pretzels and water all over himself and the couch.

How?

Well, we were watching The Biggest Loser.

During the weigh-in Sherry (the pink team mom) starts toward the scale and Mr F says "She's the one I'm nervous for."

"Yeah, plus I like her." I say.

Then add...

"Cause I'd look like her if I was fat."

Right then the camera scanned her body.

And Mr F started laughing so hard he actually started throwing up.

Which was disgusting... but... also hilarious. And in part to get out of the range of fire but also because my body had gone limp with laughter I fell to the ground and lay there convulsing. Which only made his condition worsen. And I turned to look just as I saw another round of pretzel and water come propelling out of his mouth.

Of course what was so funny about this was that his immediate free flowing laugh attack was an undeniable open acknowlegement that YES that is what I would look like.

Which was kind of an insult.

But I had hit the nail so firmly on the head that any normal husband to wife filter was trumped and the truth came out... along with the pretzels.

And it couldn't have been funnier.

Making Amends

Dear Childcare Mom,

I am so sorry about this morning. Double the punishment for you... you had to see me with my Liza Minnelli morning hair!

Turns out someone (Baby) was playing with my alarm clock and reset it for 11.
Again, I am really sorry you all had to wait out in the cold. I'll credit you back $5 for today.

Mrs F

The Real Hoarder In The House

Hold Me

Are you as afraid of this as I am?

(I'd like to add all the usual disclaimers: #1 the rest of the house is clean and organized #2 this is our room of shame that has NEVER never worked in this house #3 recent events forced me to go through that craft/clothing closet in a hurried maniacal way resulting in what now appears before you #4 I'm afraid of paper)


What about this?

(That's baby hitting as close to me as allowed without actually hitting me.... Guess who told her to do it)



PROGRESS REPORT:
3 PM

5 PM
I'm onto the stuff that is less gratifying and more tedious (the paper)... I am losing steam

(I would like to note that that moving box has been under there SINCE WE MOVED. Ditto the two canvas bags... all of it paper work that of course I clearly don't need yet seem to have deemed necessary to keep.)
7 PM

It may not seem like there is much difference in this photo from the above... but there is. Lots of trashing and filing. That bag & box are filled with random old paperwork, checkbooks to closed accounts, art work, etc. This is where I usually give up and just clean off the desk and shove that stuff back underneath. I'm sticking it out this time.... just not today. It's now after 9, I've worked out and put the kids to bed. It's time to clean up the house before Monday AM rolls around. I'll finish this tomorrow! I swear!!

Oh No She Didn't... No, Seriously, She Didn't

Yesterday I had to run an errand at the mall with Baby.

Anytime we enter a public bathroom Baby mistakes the awesome acoustics for an echo chamber and begins yelling over and over again at the top of her lungs...

"Echo! Echo! Echo!..."

Which means I need to do my business in under a second and get us the hell out of there.

This time when I walked out of the bathroom she continued to shout "Echo!" startling the security guard who was standing right outside the bathroom door (why was he standing there anyway?)

Then we turned the corner and headed toward the shops and she was still sitting in her stroller screaming out "Echo!"

I just try to smile.

I cannot for the life of me get her to understand that hearing herself repeat echo is not actually an echo.

An elderly couple walks up and the woman stops, gently touches my arm, and says...

"What is she saying?"

"She's saying 'Echo'. " I reply.

"Oh. I thought she was saying 'Asshole'." The old woman says with a mischievous smile.

My jaw nearly dislocated as it hit the floor.

Which left me wondering which would actually have been more shocking...

A three year old saying "Asshole" or a ninety-three year old?

My vote is with ninety-three year old.

Because let me tell you that is not what I was expecting to hear come out of her mouth.

Ahh... That Feels Better

Before:

After:

Loving these new storage bins(I have the small & medium sizes). Significantly smaller in profile and more stackable than the shoebox size lidded containers. Also perfectly clear so the kids can see exactly which bin is which. And easier to open and close! I'll be getting more for my sewing things ASAP.

Sorry Peeps

I must check out for awhile.
I'm feeling overwhelmed.
I'm terrified of making another mistake.
Lots of major decisions are being made and there is a lot to do and process.
(I'm also feeling censored.)
Maybe I'll make some videos... but for now I just need to move my life forward.
I should also start cleaning off my desk.
We finally ordered a rug for our office (online... who the hell knows what it is actually going to look like?!)
And some clothes for myself that fit (so glad I finally did that).
I'm feeling like I've been letting a lot of things I can't control control me.
I've been so caught up in the things I can't do that I have stopped doing the things I can.
Which has only been making me feel guilty on top of everything else.

I've Been Wondering

Why my shoulder blades feel like they were run over (and over) by a truck.

Then I remembered...

I got to chip ice and shovel the sidewalk.

Today I got to babysit and go grocery shopping.

True Stories

"Alright, I need you to do what we talked about last week and do more than the minimum I ask you to do." Mrs F directs toward Mr F.

"Yup." Mr F replies.

"I know you just walked in the door, but I haven't even had the luxury of walking out the door today." Mrs F clarifies.

"Yes you did." Kid pipes up.

"You got to go out and shovel the sidewalk." She continues.

"That's true... and it was awesome." Mrs F retorts.

You aren't cool enough to hang with her.

The Cake

white cake filled with fresh strawberries and covered in traditional vanilla buttercream
and YES those are gigantic heart Peeps

Three... It's The Magic Number

Baby stayed up late enough, due to an ill timed nap, to actually ring in her birthday. She celebrated by opening her gift from Sweetie & Popi. A Dolphin Pillow Pet! People if you haven't fallen for the Pillow Pet commercials you are missing out! Pillow Pets are the bomb. They are fantastic. Super duper soft and cute. Totally worth the $19.99! 



This morning Baby opened her new number shirt from The Cougar (from Chasing Fireflies if you need one of your very own). She gave Baby one last year and it has been one of her favorite things to wear (outside of pjs... and check out those adorable men's style pjs people!) so when she called to ask for an idea I knew just what to tell her.... a number 3 shirt (too bad Baby is convinced she is 4) This is another fun, useful, while still being *special* gift I recommend for kids... while they are still young enough to be proud of their age.
While the kids fought over the pillow pet I hopped to in the kitchen.  
Around the Furious house we try to keep things simple but festive.  Here's her little face when she walked in and saw the decorations...

Trader Joe's Chocolate Croissants for breakfast... a gift we could all enjoy.


I'm off to make a big pink cake covered in Valentine's Day candy... more to come...