It's Beginning To Look A Little Like Christmas

Mr F Was Wrong

Somewhat Overdue

I was meaning to post this video and discussion last month since November is both the anniversary of Kid's official diagnosis and also Epilepsy Awareness Month. But I have to say that I'm trying to push down my state of worry (and moments of hopefulness... lest they be dashed) and talking about it or thinking about it has been difficult.

Today was the last day that Kid will take her anti-seizure medication. This morning she had her last dose... maybe forever... maybe for now. The uncertainty is overwhelming.

Today, by chance, the nurse who came to give us our life insurance physicals revealed (for no apparent reason) that her son has epilepsy. Boy did that bring up a lot of feelings. His is not the same as Kid's but not that different. We had a lot to talk about and it really made me wish that there were more support groups geared toward the parents. Many places don't have a support group at all and if they do it is for caregivers of adults with epilepsy. We had so many things in common... the mood swings... unexplained fevers and vomiting... the bed wetting (who freaking knew? Kid wet the bed twice since weaning her meds and I guess that can be a sign that she was seizing... all new levels of worry are entering my mind).

So I'm sitting with it. I'm just trying to stay the course. I'll talk more about it when I can do it without having to think so much. I'm also thinking of taking the family to D.C. in the spring and participate in the annual Epilepsy Walk there. It might be nice to talk with other parents. It might also do some of them good to see a child who has (hopefully) made it to the other side of their journey... give them a little hope that there (sometimes) is an end.

Cause And Effect

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Listen Up!

Wondering how the Compacting is going? Well. Very, very, well. Shockingly so.

The results are in... aka... the credit card statement has arrived! And take a guess at how much we saved in one month of Compacting?

1100 freaking dollars folks! Believe it.

Now here is the truly astounding thing... I still went to Target. We still ate organic. I even bought the kids some clothes. We did not go without.

Changes we made:

• I cut my grocery spending nearly in half by meal planning around what we had on hand each week and trying to buy as little as I could get away with. While I've been meal planning all along planning this way meant I was typically only buying fresh diary, meat & vegetables. Pantry items Mr F stocked up on at Whole Foods which saves us considerably.
  
• Mr F started taking a sandwich to work everyday. FYI my grocery spending included his new lunch.
  
• I enforced a "only make as much coffee as you are going to drink" rule. We had been dumping half our coffee every week... which was $7 down the drain. Might not seem like a big deal but it is the small things that add up!
  
• I shopped (at Target etc) only for what I needed RIGHT then. Not things I might need next month... that is definitely my habit at both Target and the grocery store. By cutting out my "anticipatory needs" at each shopping trip (a serious challenge I assure you!) I cut my spending in half at almost every trip.
  
• Instead of ordering pizza we started making frozen pizza on Friday nights (or this week homemade).
  
• We didn't cut out going out to eat entirely but we definitely made cheaper choices and really weighed out if going out was worth it.... sometimes it wasn't (that's when you want to have a few frozen pizzas in the freezer).
  

That's it. Basically by being more conscious of our spending we cut out a thousand bucks of unnecessary spending. That seems crazy to me... but it is true. Did it take some thought and self control? Yes. But was it actually difficult? No. I wasn't sure we'd save that much even if we cut out all spending outside of food and gas... I'm shocked. And I didn't cut out all spending. I think adopting a "do I need this today" shopping test is key. Does it mean you might have to go back to the store tomorrow? Maybe... but I think you'll find you don't.

I'm excited to see what our savings are for this month. I'm hoping that we'll be able to stick in the same range of spending (which was the lowest since we've had kids). If we can that means we are covering tuition and an addition $300 bucks that could go to something fun like a VACATION. I feel so much more in control and positive about our financial outlook... and that is saying something!

Now You Tell Me

"If you wait for sex to happen spontaneously it ain't going to happen."

This Week The Plan

I'm getting down to business...

Menu:

Monday - Potato Leek Soup, crab cakes, salad

Tuesday - Brown Sugar & Ginger Salmon, rice & broccoli

Wednesday - potluck ???

Thursday - spinach stuffed egg crepes, tomato soup

Friday - homemade pizza, salad

Saturday - dinner out

Sunday - Shrimp Lo Mein


Kid's Lunches:

Monday - hard boiled egg, gogurt, carrots & ranch, milk, pb &J

Tuesday - hard boiled egg, gogurt, orange, milk, potato soup

Wednesday - smoked salmon, gogurt, apple, milk, spelt pizza (from school)

Thursday - smoked salmon, gogurt, avocado, milk, leftover salmon & rice

Friday - smoked salmon, gogurt, apple, milk, pb & j


Diet & Exercise:
I'm back to food journaling but for this week I'm not counting calories. I just need to get back in the habit of keeping track and making mindful choices.
As for exercise I'm going to do 5 days. I'm not pushing myself crazy hard... just show up and give a good effort.


Errands & Chores:

Monday - groceries, decorate outside of house and begin inside

Tuesday - clean up kitchen & craft area, put away clean clothes

Wednesday - continue decorating, vacuum

Thursday - shop for Compacting Christmas boxes

Video Update

Now That's A Welcome Home

While I was away Mr F transformed my room from this:

To this:



Sometimes when Mr F paints a room while I'm gone (which is our usual arrangement since it keeps the kids out of the room) I end up being disappointed in the paint color. I pick them out but when you are going by a chip and not a full wall you can be slightly off. Once it's painted it's painted and Mr F is not going to repaint it just to appease me (believe me I lived with the wrong purple in our dining room for 7 years)... so I was thrilled that this turned out to be exactly what I wanted!! Yay!

Nicholas Sparks...

Is a goddamn sadistic bastard.

Need A Laugh?

Mr F's got that covered.

The Anti-Black Friday Exercise

I was over at the New Dream website (which I found while trying to assess our carbon footprint the other day) reading their Simplifying the Holidays pamphlet when I came across a fascinating Compacting Christmas activity.

They suggest adding up ALL the money you spent on Christmas (still have your receipts from last year?!!!), and when they say all they really mean all... stocking stuffers, wrapping paper, gifts... the whole nine yards. Then see what percentage it is of your annual take-home income. If you discovered you spent more on Christmas then say your year's heating bill would that change your spending perspective? Or if it's more than you spent on a full month of food?

It's one thing to look back and realize you spent a hell of a lot more than you intended (or with all the little incidentals... then you realized). It's a whole different thing to realize you spent more than you did on a house payment. Not that we did... or you did... but you know what I'm saying. In general I think most of us set up our spending either based on guilt, or precedence, or an arbitrary number... I don't think very many of us do it from this *whole picture* perspective. I know we never have.

When we get home I'm going to look up our last year's spending and I'll let you know what our percentage of spending was. I'll also let you know what I plan on spending this year.

Thanksgiving

So far only two of the kids have puked.

Just Be Glad You're Not In My Family

or there would be a pretty good chance I'd want to harm you right now.





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Two Boots Sangria

3 parts red wine (1 bottle)
3 parts OJ (3 cups)
1.5 parts Wild Cherry Brandy (1.5 cups)
1 part 7Up (or similar.. 1 cup)
sliced fruit

mix juice, brandy & wine together and chill
pour in soda before serving and serve over ice
ENJOY!

Now we didn't have most of this stuff on hand today so I made it with wine, OJ, weird old brandy, ginger ale and an additional 2 cups of apple cider. It's fantastic and somewhat more seasonally appropriate. The wild cherry brandy is much sweeter than what I used and it needed a little mellowing ;)

Does It Look Like I'm Having A Happy Thanksgiving?

Turkey Trot

Need help this Thanksgiving?

Here's how to do it:

The Brine


The Roasting


The Carving

Drum Roll Please

And The Furious Compacting Christmas winners are....


Congratualions go to:


Andrea

Robin

&

Torey


email me your addresses and then check your mailboxes

There's Still Time

If you haven't entered already then giddy up!

We'll be doing the drawing tonight!!



Turkey Day Etiquette Questions:

So tell us what do you do?!!!

What's Gonna Work?... Team Work!

The kids are working together in a tag team fashion to take break me. I woke up this morning ... well I guess I woke up several fucking times last night ... then I was woken up this morning by Kid crying hysterically. I guess when she looked over and saw Baby and I missing she freaked out. It turns out I had decided to sleep on the goddamn floor in an effort to save my back... and Baby was with me since she woke up crying hysterically shortly after I disappeared to the carpeted nether regions.

Well Kid's wake up came at 6. I know some of you out there are thinking "6?!! We got up at 5 every day!" Yeah well we don't. And the kids apparently got a hit of crack mixed in with the Sander's bump cake they had before bed. They should have been tired at 8:30 (their usual bedtime) since they had gotten up early yesterday too... but Baby was just romping around the bed growling like a rabid gorilla... which made it understandably difficult for Kid to fall asleep. After about 45 minutes I threw in the towel and let them get back up. An hour and half of gymnastics later (hmm... seems all the visiting might be a bit over stimulating) I got them back down. So do the math on that one and you'll find they went down close to 11.

A little while later I settled in on the floor. I probably had about an hour of sleep before Baby startled awake crying and then joined me. She then woke up a handful of times more before Kid woke me up at 6. So, yeah, I don't think I ever even had a full hours sleep at a stretch. I did get Kid back to sleep for another 2 hours after some snuggling.

At 8 she woke me up by saying, at top volume, "Mom can we get up?!"

"SHHHHH!!!!! Go To The Bathroom & Go Up Stairs!!!" I whispered in my stern whisper yelling that motherhood has bestowed upon me.

Kid walked to the bathroom (it's in our room) and turned on the light flooding our floor bed in unwanted luminescence. She went to the bathroom then strolled over to the bed and continued at top volume "Can you get me some new underwear?!"

I appreciate that Kid has adopted a new modesty (you may recall it was mere weeks ago that she was quite comfortable flashing the missionaries) but get the fuck out of the goddamn room before you wake up your sister!!!!!! (Don't worry I said all that in my head while burning a hole in hers with my death rays) When I denied her request Kid then threw herself wailing on the floor then after I actually whisper yelled "GET OUT!" She left.

One minute later she returned and walked up to the bed and said at top volume "The big dog loves to follow me!" Great. Leave. I think you know this isn't going to play out in any extra sleep for me at this point but I'm not going to just give in to her at this point either. "Go upstairs!" I whisper.

And she does... not. She lingers just out of sight rustling something and making me want to explode. Of course my entire body aches and my neck feels like it was bashed with a bat all night long so it is hard for me to lift it up high enough to scan for her... plus I'm still trying to keep Baby asleep. "Ruby!" I whisper. She shows up and I beg her "PLEASE I NEED TO SLEEP! Go upstairs!!!"

Two minutes later I slither out of bed and turn the monitor on. I stumble up the stairs and join Kid for Mickey's Clubhouse. Baby woke up 15 minutes later. My day has officially begun. I've had 10 minutes of sleep. They've had 9 hours opposed to their typical 12... so... today should go well.


Wish me luck.


And send the coffee fairy.

The Truth

I went into Ann Arbor today. I tried to do it with an eye for the negative, but goddamn it Ann Arbor is factually nicer than Asheville. It was almost astounding to take in. Even the weird strip malls and houses that back in my AA days seemed to sit too close to the road on Stadium looked luxuriously well maintained... and seeing that there are easements with grass and trees EVERY where... were further from the road then any house I've seen in Asheville outside of the Biltmore estate! I mean everything is clean and it stands out like "LOOK AT ME!!!! I DON'T HAVE ANY GRAFFITI OR BOARDED UP (or cracked, or unstaged, etc) WINDOWS!!!" For real folks. I had actually gotten used to Asheville (and I should note that I'm not nearly as upset about being here as I feared... just noting factual differences) so it's almost odd to see things so well kept. Even the highways seem cleaner... if that is even possible. It just makes me wonder even more about what the hell is going on down there. Seriously! I'm driving around in a state that is going through terrible economic times and still things look new and maintained.
I don't know what to tell you other than buy a plane ticket to Asheville drive around the entire metro area and then get one to Ann Arbor and get back to me on your impressions. I'd be pretty surprised if you walk away with a very different take on things.

The good news is that I saw our house and lived through it. I was really worried it would be a horrible grief inducing experience but it was okay. The house looked familiar but it didn't have the "this is the house you brought your babies home to" vibe shouting out at me as we drove by. In fact it seemed small and like a house we had outgrown when I saw it. Kid seemed okay too. I did notice that we left a wind chime on our porch (which I actually always hated) and I felt the strong urge to sneak up on the porch and steal it back.. but I resisted.

That's all for now.

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Only 2 more days to enter the Compacting Christmas Giveaway!