Weekend Update

Week in review... video edition:


Quote o' the day:
"I'm going to tell you something and I'm going to tell it to you ONE time. The oven light is meant to be used to check on something. You love to turn it on and watch things bake. You're going to burn out that light... and it will never get replaced. And that does not mesh with my temperament."

NO that was not said to one of our children.


Target fashion finds:

CUTEST shoes ever and I think they speak for themselves. But if not let me help them along with this... $12.99.

I am loving this cardigan. It is really feminine... almost elegant. It's the kind of thing that takes a regular shirt and jeans and makes it look 1000 times better and more intentional. And it is the prefect weight to transition my tissue weight shirts into Fall. $22.99

Rejoice

I can't even believe it. I actually got them both to sleep.

That's particularly unusual seeing as Baby doesn't technically nap.

I don't even know what to do with myself. The prospect of having 2 potential hours to myself is UNHEARD OF.

I will not be blogging.

I'll be reading... and maybe nodding off a bit.

And eating without being interrupted.

It might even be hot.

Deep Thoughts Abound...

but I'm thoroughly occupied.

He is supposed to nap... if so... perhaps I'll be back shortly.

If not to share my deep thoughts... at least to share my new Target fashion find(s).

P.S. He calls me Mama which is pretty endearing.

Pass Me Some Tape

I need to tape my eyes open.

I've been really struggling to adjust to our new schedule. I know a lot of you are in this boat right now.... or about to get into it. It seems to take us about a full month to get into a good rhythm. It's especially hard on us because not one of us is a natural early riser. We're getting up about 2 hours before any of us consider "morning"... and we're all exhausted by the end of the day. Even with earlier bedtimes our bodies don't think we're getting enough sleep. And it feels like with the addition of school we can't fit everything we need to do into one day. I know it doesn't make sense... but I also know you know what I mean. It's just a huge schedule adjustment and I feel frazzled and stressed and pulled in 1000 directions. I need coffee to wake up and Unisom to go to sleep. My body is just fighting this time change with everything it has.

Add to that the fact that it's 12:45 and this is the first time I've sat down since I woke up this morning.

Which is made worse by the fact that I was already tired yesterday... and so was Baby... which is why she collapsed into a deep dark coma at 5:50PM last night only to get up 2 hours later... and then stayed up until 11:45PM.

I don't love when that kind of thing happens but it's a heck of a lot easier on me when I don't have to get up early the next morning to meet my new charge:
He wasn't scheduled to come today but yesterday afternoon his mother called to ask if he might not come over at the crack of dawn for a little warm up session before being dropped off for a full day tomorrow. I thought that that was a good idea... for him... and for Baby. So I got up extra early. I even showered and put on 50% clean clothing.

Things went very well. He didn't want to leave. His dad was a bit surprised... I guess my awesomeness is a bit unassuming at times.

We'll see how it goes tomorrow. Hopefully I'll be working off more than 6 hours of sleep.

Before and After

Before (weird cheap Target vanity stool... with stained seat):

After:


I'm really excited about this project. I've been reading a lot of decorating blogs of late and am always impressed with what these ladies can do with a little spray paint and fabric. It's made me a bit jealous of their ingenuity and their eye for seeing the diamond in the rough. I feel like I just don't have that. But I started thinking about it. Trying to rationalize that spray paint can't be that hard... can it? So I bought some and then shelved them not having the courage to risk ruining something. And then one day I noticed... fully noticed... maybe for the first time Kid's weird vanity stool that she uses as a chair for her desk in our family room. It looks awful there but it's the right height so I've just let it go. So the other night when I was looking at it I realized "I hate that stool... I can't ruin it!" And I couldn't have if I tried. It was ugly from day one.

So I thought I'd use the red paint I've had sitting around hoping for the courage to use. And I borrowed a scrap of cute fabric (is that not the cutest?!) I'd bought for making skirts with.

And Ta Da! This project took about 20 minutes for the spray painting (I did two coats) and 15 or so for recovering the seat. And both of those were surprisingly easy to do. I just stapled the new fabric on with Mr F's staple gun. I'm sure with a little practice I could do something similar in even less time. I do love a quick, nearly instant gratification, style project.

Kid saw it and said "Oh Mommy I love it."

Then a minute later...

"What happened to my white chair?"

There were some tears after that.

Father Of The Year

"You know when you do that it makes me want to freak out...

and drive the car over you." Mr F admonishes Kid last night.

Happy Anniversary Mr F!

8 down.... 50 or so to go (if he starts working out... about 25 if he doesn't).

Confirmation

Oh. My. God.

That woman is a total idiot.

Thank God I got out while the getting was good.

I mean... COMPLETE moron.

What Not To Wear

"You're not leaving the house like that." Mrs F announces upon seeing Mr F this morning.

"The socks?" Mr F guesses sheepishly.

"Yeah." Mrs F replies.

Mr F laughs and heads back to the laundry room.

If This Doesn't Make You Feel Better About Your Housekeeping Nothing Will

I was over at Amy's place and I've decided to take on her "Let's Get Real 2009: Perfect People Lie" challenge. You know you can always count on me for a dose of reality... and... a dose of bad housekeeping. So I'm in.

I would like you to keep in mind that my house was IMMACULATE on Tuesday. And when I say immaculate I really mean it... I even vacuumed out the couch cushions! I'm not actually saying that to assuage my housekeeping guilt (okay maybe a little) I am saying that so you can take in the full scope of our mess making abilities. It's been less than 5 full days.

So without further ado I'll give you MY HOUSE RIGHT NOW:

Kitchen (seriously people... this is nothing):

Living Room (also maybe one of the best rooms in the house... since this picture things have taken a dramatic downward turn in there):

Family Room (this room is SO messy I needed to break it into two parts to get a shot of all the crap!... and most of this is from TODAY):


Girls' room (Keep in mind that I made their beds with new bedding THIS MORNING):

Office (Okay this room wasn't immaculate. It pretty much always looks like this.... it is the room where all things go to die.):

The bathroom and my bedroom are actually still perfectly clean... I don't want to tarnish our imperfection so I left those off ;)

I Quit

Dear First Grade Teacher,

I found the tone you used, while talking to me yesterday, to be incredibly offensive. I do not like to be talked to like I am a six year old using six year old logic. I am not only older than you are, I have more education, more experience working with parents in a school setting, and have been parenting my own children longer. Is it not possible that my perspective might have some validity?

Good luck replacing me.

Sincerely,
Mrs F

Never A Dull Moment

WARNING... I am having more than a little trouble with the old internet connection the past 24 hours. Everything is taking FOREVER to load. If this goes up it will likely have mistakes... and I won't be correcting them... do not judge... and I may not be able to return comments (some from yesterday too... sorry) until things get back to normal. It's just too frustrating and I have more important things to stress about... trust me.


Things are going on.

Things were going on.... and then they weren't... and now they are again.

It's been a bit of a roller coaster the last couple of weeks. But in a weird way I'm thankful for it because it gave me a bit of perspective and has allowed for some stabilizing walls to be put up in an effort to protect my mental state.

For some obvious reasons (that you will just have to guess about) I can't talk about all this.

I can just say we are sitting atop a precipice and I need to be prepared for the fall... either way.

Our entire life might change in short order.

Or...

It might not (a fall of much more depressing and familiar kind).

I'm staying surprisingly level headed. I'm of course stressed and feeling a bit in limbo and having a TON of things thrown at me (suddenly several kids need childcare?!)... and while on one hand I'd like to accept... on the other.... I'm not sure I can commit. It's hard. I really don't know what to do. I don't want to miss out on an opportunity for the work but when I say change I do mean CHANGE and it would be impossible for me to care for them.

And of course it's all coming at once and everything is time sensitive.

My strategy is to try and take this one day at a time.

Hopefully we'll have an answer sooner rather than later.

And hopefully I'll be okay with it when it happens.

All I can say is...

Dear Someone,
I want this for me... but more than that... I want it for you. I could live this hell hole of a year ten thousand times over it I thought it'd end with you getting the respect and clout you deserve. You're better than you think you are. And I believe she's going to see it.
Love,
Me

10 Years Ago

Mr F and I went on our first date.

He's been obsessed with me ever since.

Kind of.

Deep down.

He just doesn't always show it.

That's what I tell myself.

(No. Seriously he is. He can't even deny it... he just starts laughing nervously.)


If you want to read more about a love so furious it shouldn't be legal you can do so here...
Love Story Part 1
Love Story Part 2
Love Story Part 3

Maybe one day when I have a spare 10,000 hours I'll finish the saga. Part 11 might be titled "When The Shit Hit The Fan".


One day soon I'll write part 4. That is when we finally had our date. That is also when it became obvious that neither one of us would ever confront a stranger unless perhaps our life depended on it. And when asked at restaurants how things are we would both always respond "Great!" even if we'd been waiting over 2 hours for our dinner and then served the wrong dish.

And for the record I did not let him kiss me on our first date.

It was a new tactic I was trying out.

And

Shazam!

It worked.

Keep that in mind ladies.

Here We Go Again

I'm actually feeling surprisingly sad this morning. Maybe it's because I'm not going to drop her off and settle her into her room this year (5%). Maybe it's because I just like being around her (60%). Or maybe it's because having her around makes Baby about 1000 times easier to deal with (35%).

I decided to let Baby sleep as long as possible... because... she is going to commit hari kari when she wakes up and realizes Kid is gone... ALL DAY. The longer I can put that off the better. I see a lot of gummy bears in her near future.


Yesterday Kid was getting a bit anxious about the big day. In an effort to focus on the positive we threw an impromptu "Happy First Grade!" celebration last night. That did help tremendously with Kid's "night before" jitters.... or at least staved them off until the quiet dark of her bedroom. She was still sleeping bundled up like a little baby when I went in this morning. Oh it killed me to have to wake her up!



It also killed me to have to pack lunch again. God, I hate packing a lunch. It takes for freaking ever and is the most tedious process on the planet. Hate it hate it hate it.



Last year Mr F decided in a fit of panic to cut open Kid's backpack when the zipper got stuck. Way to go hot head. So I had to dig around the basement and find her old preschool one and dust it off this morning. As punishment I made him wear it.



Actually they're riding the tandem operation this morning and it's all we can ask that she HOLD ON while riding along the busy road... we don't need to worry about her toppling over under the weight of the bag.

Video Update

It Is With A Queasy Stomach That I Announce....

The return of...

This Week The Plan

People. People! I'm not looking forward to this.

Menu:

Monday - Parent Orientation night... kids eat at Mr F's office

Tuesday - Shrimp Scampi w/ noodles & sauteed broccoli

Wednesday - Roast Chicken, crispy potatoes & Sherry and Garlic Sauteed squash & carrots

Thursday - Honey Mustard Glazed Salmon w/ seasoned rice & green beans

Friday - Pizza night w/ sliced tomatoes

Saturday - Chicken & Cheese Enchiladas

Sunday - Tomato & Meatball Soup w/ salad


Kid's School Lunches:

Wednesday - hard boiled egg, watermelon, yogurt, turkey sandwich, milk

Thursday - hard boiled egg, strawberries, yogurt, pb&j, milk

Friday - hard boiled egg, tomatoes, yogurt, tuna sandwich, milk


Errands & Chores:

Monday - laundry, vacuum, parent orientation

Tuesday - grocery shopping, put away clean clothes

Wednesday - 1st day of school, make returns (Lowe's, Michael's, etc)

Thursday - pick up girls' room

Friday -

Saturday -

Sunday -


Diet & Exercise:
I'll be addressing this in detail tomorrow.
I'm going to continue food journaling. Eating under 1400 a day. And working out 40-60 min a day. I'll be doing the 30 day shred 3x this week.

Selective Hearing

"Dude you've got to use Google Reader." Mrs F says between bites of graham cracker.

"What's that Chewy?" Mr F replies.

Mrs F takes another bite and says...

"I'm going to hurt you."

"Did you hear that?!" She asks.

Mr F laughs.

Dressed For Success

This is Baby's preferred summertime look.
Yes she's wearing a combination of PJs, sweatshirt, and fleece hat.
I am aware that some people would not allow this. I mean it was a near 90 degree day. And she did look.... um.... special. But I have always gotten some kind of pleasure, pride even (not for myself but for my kids), out of allowing them to wear their clothes their way.

Plus, I find it results in a lot more laughs and a lot less fights.

Saturday Morning Musings

"How about getting some clothes on?" Mrs F suggests.

"I can't... I'm a nudist." Kid replies.


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"I need chocolate chips!" Baby demands while trying to scale the pantry.

"What do you need chocolate chips for?" Mrs F inquires.

"I need a chocolate chip for my mouth!" Baby replies.


******************************************************

"You need to clean up your room. Someone could trip and die in here." Mrs F says to Kid.

"They might trip, but I scarcely think they would die." Kid retorts.


*******************************************************

In yesterday's Parent Council meeting someone brought up emergency plans. At some point the director mentioned in an off hand way sniper attacks as an example of an emergency the school might face. Shortly thereafter a mother suggested the school post their emergency plans on their website so that the parents could access them and be put at ease.

"I'm sorry... but you just mentioned sniper attacks... I think that posting the school's emergency plans on a public website is a terrible idea." I interjected barely able to contain myself.

Not that I think we're in danger of a sniper attack... but... come on.

Now you see what I'm dealing with...

MORONS

Oh No She Didn't

Last night Mr F went back into work. So instead of our usual nighttime routine I got to snuggle Kid instead of him.

"You are much warmer than Daddy." Kid remarked.

"My beauty gives off more heat." I replied teasingly.

"Well... that can't be true... you don't have very much of it." Kid stated matter-of-factly.